Dear Journal,
So! I returned from South Korea 43 days ago. I moved back into my parent’s house. I’m currently living with my mum, dad, younger sister and younger brother… and of course we cannot forget our adorable puppy Penny. (not really a puppy – she’s 6 years old)
Since returning, things have been incredibly difficult. For starters, I NEVER thought that I could miss a country so much. (Mostly the food! Haha.) I didn’t even miss England that much when I was in Korea if I’m honest. And secondly, it’s taking me a while to re-adjust to England.
When I left Korea, I left a lot of special people behind, whom I miss every single day. Messages and phone calls just aren’t the same as going for coffee or going shopping together. But it’s better than nothing I suppose.
When I think about it, I had a similar feeling when I first got on the plane to move to Korea. I was also leaving behind my friends and family in England. I guess that’s what is so hard about moving to a new place. You get comfortable, you find those ‘regular’ restaurants and cafes that you love to spend time in, then things change very quickly and you can find yourself a little bit lost.
As Christmas is fast approaching, I think back to what I was doing this time last year. I spent Christmas in Seoul. It was fantastic, but it wasn’t familiar. It was a… different type of Christmas, but by no means in a bad way. Just… Different. Christmas Eve I spent it at a friends house, we had a little Christmas party, it was really fun. My friend had this awesome polaroid camera. I really want to buy one too!
When I woke up on Christmas morning, I was alone, I ate breakfast and drank a small cup of coffee. Then found myself staring at the little pile of presents my parent’s sent me. I had placed them under a small tree that I had bought from Daiso a month previously. It was only a cheap one, but it make me feel more Christmassy.
As I opened the gifts I cried and cried.
Christmas just wasn’t the same. I was used to getting up and anticipating the moment my parent’s said we could go and sit in the living room and give our gifts to each other. (yes, I still did that at aged 22 – what can I say? I love Christmas) As well as the stockings that my parent’s had kept since we were babies. There are so many Christmassy memories.
In Korea I didn’t have gifts wrapped and ready to give my family. I wasn’t going to be able to enjoy a true Christmas dinner. I wasn’t able to thank my mum for cooking an incredible meal (because she really does know how to cook it well).
I wasn’t unhappy when I found myself alone in my apartment. I wasn’t unhappy because I knew that I had a fun packed long weekend to spend in Seoul. I just became overwhelmed and felt increasingly lonely. It made me realise how much I appreciated family Christmases.
But this year is different, I have returned home for Christmas. In fact, I will be spending a little more time at home over the next few months. I’m intending on returning to Korea in early 2017. I just need to make plans for that to happen.
I guess what I’m saying is, although my time at home recently hasn’t been the best. I am glad that I’m home for Christmas and that I will be around family and friends.
I hope that you all are having a fantastic Christmas so far~
– Hannah
P.S 메리 크리스마스! ❤