Confidence is always something that I’ve struggled with. Over the past year or so I’ve been trying my upmost best to build up my confidence.
I often feel like I am trying to prove to myself that I can do things. I can go to the shops by myself. I can get on that train by myself. To be quite honest I feel a bit strange writing this down because if you’ve followed me for a while you will know that I moved away for university. I also went and lived in South Korea by myself.
So for someone who has lived alone and managed to move halfway across the world, how can they struggle with confidence?
Well to tell you the truth I go through phases of being confident and then being withdrawn. Some days I feel like I can do anything. Then other days it’s like I don’t have any confidence and I just want to hide away.
It’s very frustrating, I want to be confident.
To build my confidence I have tried to make myself do small things. Maybe I will walk to the shop by myself. Maybe I will go and sit in a coffee shop for an hour or so. or maybe I will get on a bus and go to a nearby town for the day. Like I said, some days all of those things are so easy and enjoyable to accomplish and I quite often don’t even think about it. Other days its a chore to do those things.
One of the things I learnt whilst doing CBT was to reward the things that you find difficult. I try and set myself goals of the things I want to achieve. Once I achieve a goal I make sure that I reward myself for doing it. My CBT therapist always emphasised the importance of this technique as it trains the brain to recognise the goal as a positive thing rather than something to be anxious/scared about.
Over the coming week I’m going to be working on taking walks by myself. You might be aware that I’ve just moved to a new place so I’m working on making myself feel more comfortable here. I think this is a very positive step for me so I’m looking forward to achieving this goal. I think that it will do wonders for my confidence. 😀
What techniques do you use to build your confidence?
– Hannah ❤