It’s Been Quite A While.

Well hello there, it’s been such a long time since I’ve uploaded onto this blog. There are many reasons why I haven’t, the main one being, life has just kinda been a bit crazy!

A few weeks ago I started a new job and I’m loving it so far! The staff are so lovely and they really have made me feel part of the team.

I can’t believe that it’s almost September! Where is this year going?

I had a lot of fears and anxiety about uploading on here again. After giving it much thought I just figured that I didn’t really have anything to loose. Besides, I really miss my rambling thoughts!

Tomorrow marks a pretty big day for me. It’s the day that I’ve been waiting for for a good 2 and a half years, maybe a little longer than that now that I think about it. It’s the last day that I will spend on anti-depressants. I will be 100% medication free! I cannot believe how much my life has changed. Of course I still have bad days, and I still find myself rattled with anxiety. But for the most part, life is great! It’s been an uphill battle but I wouldn’t change it for the world.

I’ve started going to the gym more too. It’s doing wonders for my self-confidence! I’m also doing tons of reading. I’m currently reading Becoming by Michelle Obama, she’s such an inspiration! OH and also, I don’t know how I could possibly forget this! My sister has moved down to Kent. How amazing is that? I’ve been loving spending more and more time with her.

So that kind of sums up what I’ve been up to.

What have you guys been up to? I would love to hear all about it.

-Hannah x

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Foot Recovery.

Hello and welcome back to my blog.

On February the 19th I had an operation on my foot to remove a bunion that was causing me so much pain in and around my left foot.

After having a check up appointment this morning, the doctor is very happy with the amount that my foot has healed.

They did an xray on my foot. I was so shocked by how much you could see. They put three screws in my big toe to keep it straight. I’m so happy to have my foot back and not in pain. I have been cleared to go back to the gym. Apart from running I will be pretty much okay to do everything I would normally do, which is awesome.

So now that my foot is completely on the mend, I will be completing a fitness course that I have enrolled on. I will be putting together my fitness plan and diary. I can’t wait to share this part of my life with you.

I hope that you’re all having an amazing start to the week.

Much love,
Hannah x

Taming My Mind.

Dear Journal,

Its been such a long time since I’ve written in this section of the blog.

I guess in many ways I felt as though it was a bit redundant, irrelevant almost. Being in recovery brings thoughts and questions of “How on earth did I ever feel that low?!”

Over the past two months, I’ve been working closely with my therapist and my doctor to reduce my medication. There are a couple of reasons for this:

No.1: I don’t want to take medication anymore. I want to see how I can cope without it. I want to see how I am, unmediated.

No.2: the boyfriend and I have talked about trying for a baby towards the end of the year. There are too many risks during pregnancy being on these tablets. Plus, I want to breastfeed.

Anyway, back to the point, the medication has to be reduced twice more before I will be medication free. I’m told it will take another 3 months, which isn’t that long to be honest.

Recently, I have been struggling though. A lot more than I have done in the past year. Admittedly, there are many factors as to what is contributing to this. A couple of weeks ago I had an operation on my foot. I am unable to work. (Big big knockdown for me) and no gym. Also massive knockdown. I am stressed to the max.

Yesterday I admitted to my boyfriend that I didn’t want to be alive anymore. In that moment, I really did mean it. Although upon reflection, I know that’s not how i truly feel. I’m just struggling and drowning and I can’t seem to drag myself out of this pit that just seems to be getting deeper and deeper.

I know that its going to be okay. I know that when I look back at these past few days in a few months time I will congratulate myself for pushing through. I just know it! It’s just at this moment in time, I don’t see the light. It’s just dark.

But that’s okay.

Tomorrow, it’s a new day. New beginning. New things to achieve. And new goals to set.

Until then, enjoy the rest of your evening.

Much love,

Hannah x

What Have I been Up To?

Hey there, I hope that you’re having a great Sunday. It’s been such a long time since I’ve posted here. Life has just kinda got in the way and the more time that has passed, the more and more I felt anxious about posting.

I guess I should start by doing a re-cap about what I’ve been up to.

Christmas was amazing. Josh and I spent our first Christmas in our own place. We went to Josh’s mum’s house in the afternoon and we also stayed over. We played lots of family games, ate lots of good food and we also exchanged presents. On boxing day we went to Ramsgate to spend the day with Josh’s dads side of the family. We had a late Christmas with my family early Jan.

We went to a New Years Eve party which was so much fun. We played lots of games and maybe one or two glasses of Prosecco. Lol.

I spent January working out in the gym, working lots of hours at work and working on some of my new years resolutions. I will talk about them in a post early next week.

Last week I had a long awaited operation on my foot so I’ve been resting up whilst it heals. So that means, no walks, no gym and pretty much not doing anything for at least the first week. I’m back at the hospital tomorrow and hopefully they will be removing the cast and fitting a shoe so I will be able to walk on it.

But yeah, I just thought I would check in and say hey. Let me know what you’ve been up to and if you’ve set any new years resolutions. I would love to know what you guys are challenging yourselves to do this year!

Much love,
Hannah x

Primark Haul – Autumn 2018

Guess what?

I finally, (yes! Finally) uploaded a Primark Haul video for Autumn.

I received a lot of messages this year asking me if I was going to make a YouTube channel.

The answer is yes!

I have finally started posting more. I hope to be posting once a week from now on!

Be sure to head over to my channel and subscribe for new videos. I’m very excited about starting this adventure. It’s a way to make myself feel a bit more comfortable and confident in front of the camera as well as in myself.

Much love,
Hannah x

Coffee Adventure – Hessian Coffee Company.

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Hello and welcome back to another Coffee Adventure post. This weeks post is a little different in the sense that I will be sharing with you some coffee that I have recently received, rather than a coffee shop. It’s still an adventure though!

I have followed Hessian Coffee Company for a while on Instagram and they’ve been a company that I’ve wanted to work with for some time. I’m very excited to have received these sample packs for me to try!

Go follow them on
@ Instagram 
@ Facebook
@ Twitter 
@ Hessian Coffee Website

Okay, lets jump straight in!

Out of the three I definitely preferred the Bourbon Select and the Espresso Reserve. I feel that they were a bit sweeter. I have a very sweet tooth and the espresso No.1 was just a little too bitter for me.

I brewed the coffee for about 4-5 minutes.
I added a drop of caramel. Because why not?
Foamed a bit of milk and I was ready to indulge.

It made the perfect morning coffee to kick start my day!

I love that the Bourbon Select already had that hint of caramel, it was certainly enjoyable. Although, I do have to admit that the Espresso Reserve would easily become my everyday coffee.

I also used this coffee to make cold brews too and it was delicious.

It you are feeling super adventurous and want to make your own cold brew a little more creamy and luxurious, try this!

Ready?

  1. Brew your coffee as normal.
  2. Get your blender ready.
  3. Scoop a serving of vanilla ice cream in into the blender. (use milk as a lower calorie alternative) soya milk also works great!
  4. Add a couple of ice cubes.
  5. A drop of syrup.
  6. Add your desired amount of coffee to the blender.
  7. And. MIX!

And that’s it! It’s kind of like a homemade Frappuccino.

Give it a go, and if you do, be sure to tag me in your pictures over on my Instagram. @paint_me_a_smile_

I got a few questions last week asking why am I trying different types of coffee and traveling so much to different coffee shops?

Firstly, I love coffee! Like so so so much. And, I love coffee shops! I’ve always done this amount of coffee drinking and coffee shop going it’s just, I’ve never talked about it as much. (I don’t think…)

Secondly, it’s probably no secret to the people around me but in the next year or so, I will hopefully opening my own coffee and cake shop. It’s a project I have been working on for so long and I want to get it right. That means, the best coffee, the best location and I am in the best place possible to do it right.

Thirdly, I’ve wanted to do a coffee shop adventure type series on this blog for a while. I just decided now was the best time to do it.

I hope that you enjoyed this post and if you have any question coffee related or not feel free to drop me a message.

Are you a coffee shop owner or manager or does your company make coffee, I would love to work with you!

A massive thank you to Neil over at Hessian Coffee Company for kindly sending me these samples (I still have the tea bags, I will review them over on my Instagram very soon)

Stay tuned for next weeks Coffee Adventure post.

Here’s a hint about next weeks post: …Margate!

Much love and happy coffee drinking,
Hannah x

 

 

Unraveling Isobel: My Current Read.

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Dear Readers,

I just thought I would share my current read with you guys. I’m loving it so far and I can’t wait to continue reading it.

If you guys have got any suggestions of books to read I am open to suggestions.

Much love,

Hannah x

Be Your Own Best.

Dear Reader,

I wanted to start this post off as a dear journal post, however as I thought more about what I wanted to write I thought that a lot of you would relate and be feeling the same too.

Its so easy to get caught up in pushing yourself to do more, or do better. I am also very guilty of this.

I have just finished a at home yoga session with one of my favourite yoga instructors on YouTube. The session was aimed for times when you might be feeling stressed. I guess its not secret to those around me that I put a huge amount of pressure on myself to do more and be better so this session seemed appropriate.

I’ve made it my daily mission over the past week or so to try and not stress the little things and OMG has it been difficult! Its so easy to allow myself to fly off the handle about bits on the floor, and washing left on the side and don’t get me started on the time I thought we had ran out of mayonnaise. I’m on a bit of a tangent now though, the point is, life is too short.

All of the stress that we carry around on a daily basis ultimately causes us more emotional and physical pain in tbe future.

I like the saying, live for today…

Because its true. Just do your best and remind yourself that you’re doing your best and you deserve to be loved.

Keep being you and I will see you in a video I’m currently preparing to put up tomorrow.

Much love,

Hannah x

Hello August.

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Hello again, it’s Hannah here.

Today I wanted to share my August goals with you guys!

  1. Progress with doing yoga for stress management and flexibility.
  2. Upload more consistently on my blog and Instagram.
  3. Cut back on caffeine.
  4. Read two books.
  5. Treat myself more kindly.

What goals are you setting yourself this month?

Much love,

Hannah x

 

Monday Must Have.

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How is your week going so far? Well I hope!

So today I wanted to share this hand wash with you! I never thought I would say that! I guess I’m a ‘proper’ adult now.

I picked this up from Poundland a couple of weeks ago and I’m in love with it. I know I know, it’s only hand wash but I am the type of person that washes their hands very frequently. So having a hand wash that not only smells nice but that is also moisturising is something that I consider essential!

Do you have a favourite hand wash?

– Hannah ❤