Giving Up.

Going to put a mild trigger warning for anyone who doesn’t want to read about self-harm. 


Dear Journal,

I really want to write a positive post. I feel as though I’ve written so many negative ones recently. The truth is, I’m not in a good place. I’m not sure why exactly I feel like this. I have so many lovely people in my life. Most of which are there for me most of the day and night. I’m doing well at my job. I have a comfortable bed to sleep in. I can afford tea and food and other luxury items.

But I feel depressed. Yet happy at the same time. Does that make sense? I’m not sure it does, but that’s how I feel. 

Today I did really well. For the first time since I started self harming again, I actually stopped myself from doing it this morning. I forced myself to get up and eat breakfast. I had a cup of tea and watched some YouTube.

I forced myself to go to the gym. I was anxious about going because of my arm. I mean no one can see it as I was wearing a long sleeved workout top. The workout was great. Today I’ve been so productive. I walked the puppy and ate three meals.

But now, my mood is sinking. And what makes it worse is, I can’t stop it. I’ve been sat in my room crying for the past hour trying to stop myself from self harming because I know that will just make me more angry at myself.

The bottom line is, I don’t like myself. And I don’t want to be here. I have had enough of feeling like this. I feel in pain.

I want everything to be okay.

To the friends that will read this, I’m sorry that this is so depressing. I’m sorry that I’ve been snappy at you recently. I’m really not myself. Hopefully someday I will be fixed. But for now, I think I should just hold on tight.

As always, thank you for reading ❤

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Valentines Day.

Happy Valentines Day! ❤ ❤ ❤

Whether you’re single or in a relationship, I hope you have a lovely day regardless.

Did you tell your crush you like them?

Did you tell your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife that you love them? 

What do you have planned for this special day?

I won’t be doing much today. I have work during the day. Maybe I will do some yoga. Then in the evening I will curl up on the sofa with a cup of tea, a bag of mini eggs and watch a few episodes on Netflix. Perfect evening ❤

This year I’ve created a Valentines Day playlist on Spotify. Listen to it here. 🙂

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Enjoy the rest of your day ❤

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Check out some of my recent posts:

5 Ways To Say I Love You.

GRWM | Valentines Edition

Hello February.

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Dear Journal,

Where has this month gone?

I literally got zero sleep last night. I drank a mug of coffee this morning before work and I powered through. I’m so glad that I have two days off now. I have so many blog things I want to get started on for the coming month.

January was pretty great, but I am glad to say goodbye. I’m sure that February will bring some even more awesome things my way.

Yesterday I uploaded a post about February. Read it here 🙂

I’m going to crack on with some yoga. Have a late dinner. Paint my nails. Then get onto planning tomorrow’s shoot. I’m excited! 🙂

How is your week going so far? ❤

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Have a read of some of my latest posts:

Things I’m Loving This January 

Saying NO To Anxiety

Be Kind To Yourself, Always

Goals Are The Key To Motivation

Reflecting On January.

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Overall, this month has been great. Tomorrow is the final day of the month. I can’t believe how fast this year is going already.

At the start of this month I was looking for a job, and now I’m currently working. I feel so much more in control of my life. Having this job definitely makes me feel like I have a lot more options in my life.  I feel much more free and happy. 🙂

This month I’ve really learnt how to appreciate all of the amazing things and the amazing people that I have in my life. I’m incredibly lucky. I want to continue feeling this positive.

I’m feeling so accomplished.

  1. I have a job.
  2. I’ve read this months book.
  3. I’ve kept to my weekly blog schedule.
  4. I’ve eaten more healthily.
  5. I’ve done yoga more.
  6. And most importantly, I’ve made time for myself. Self-care is so important. It’s so easy to always be cornered about others and forget to take care of yourself. 

Tonight I’m planning on going to bed early, and I will start reading a new book. Then I will be fully refreshed for work tomorrow morning. 🙂

How was your January?

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Check out some of my recent posts ❤

Things I’m Loving This January 

Gratitude Challenge – A Family Member

Beating Those Winter Blues

Things I Do When I’m Feeling Down

The Power Of Positivity

 

Things I’m Loving This January.

Wow! January came and went before I knew it. It only feels like yesterday that I was writing about my December Favourites.

I have so many things that I have been loving this month. I can’t wait to share them with you. 🙂

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  • FiloFax

I don’t know what I would do without my planner. It goes everywhere with me. I love planning. I plan everything from an hour by hour schedule of my day, to tracking habits that I do on a daily basis to blog and video ideas. My dream job would be to be hired as a personal assistant for someone. Handling schedules, meetings and everything and anything organisational based. I would be obsessed!

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  • Barry M Nail Varnish

I’ve been loving this colour this month. Throughout December I mostly stuck to Christmas themed colours but now that Spring will be approaching soon enough I wanted to start wearing brighter colours. This pink is the perfect tone to brighten your look.

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  • Positive Jars

This has really helped me feel more positive this month. I will continue to add to this jar throughout February.

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  • Yoga Mat

I’ve really gotten into doing yoga this month. I’ve felt so much better for in fitting 10 minutes of yoga into my day.

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  • Coffee Mug

I’m in love with this mug. 🙂

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  • Boots

I’ve been looking for a pair of boots like these for a while. I finally found them in New Look, so I had to get them. They are so comfortable to wear too.

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  • Lipstick

I have really fell in love with this lipstick. It’s affordable, nice colour payoff and it’s not drying on the lips.

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  • Pink Pen

Actually, I’ve had this pen for a while now. But this month I have been using it so much in my planner. It’s just so cute. 🙂

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  • Mini Eggs

I have a mild obsession with these. Need I say more?

So that’s it for my January favourites.

What are some of the things that you’re loving this month?

Thank you very much for reading. I hope that you are enjoying your weekend. ❤

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P.S. Check out my December Favourites. 

Things I Do When I’m Feeling Down.

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Sometimes I have those moments where I feel like the entire world is against me. Nothing I do seems to be right. And nothing seems to lift my mood.

It’s really easy for me to lay in bed and convince myself that it’s best if I hide myself away from the world.

For the past couple of months I’ve been trying to break that cycle. Even if I wake up and don’t feel in the mood to do anything. I force myself to get up and do something, anything.

I often find that once I’m up and doing something my mood automatically lifts. Here is a list of things I do when I’m feeling down.

  • Write In My Journal
  • Read Positive Thoughts From My Positive Jar
  • Paint My Nails
  • Read A Book
  • Go For A Walk
  • Call A Friend
  • Apply Make-up
  • Do Some Baking
  • Do Yoga
  • Take A Bath
  • Watch YouTube
  • Colour in Mindfulness Book

When I’m having a bad day, I tell myself that the mood is only temporary. It will pass and that I will feel better soon.

I’ve found that it’s important to not be too hard on yourself and remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can do. If all you’ve done that day is get out of bed and watched Netflix, that’s better than nothing. You could have just stayed in bed and done nothing at all.

I’ve found that you need to remind yourself of all the positives you have in your life and not focus too much on the negatives.

What do you do when you’re feeling in a low/bad mood?

Thank you for reading. ❤

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P.S. Why not check out some of my other posts:

Saying No To Anxiety

The Power of Positivity

Be Kind To Yourself, Always

Beating Those Winter Blues

 

 

I’m feeling Accomplished.

Dear Journal,

Today was my first day at my new job. I was so nervous, I was worried that I would mess up. I was worried that I was going to freak out and panic. I was worried that I would let myself get overwhelmed and that I would embarrass myself. I was worried that the people there wouldn’t like me.

But today. Everything was great. I did it. I got through my shift. I didn’t panic or freak out. People seemed to like me, and I got on with them too.

I’m feeling accomplished. I’m feeling really positive. I’m proud of myself.

I’m going to spend a couple of hours watching YouTube before I start planning videos. 🙂

Thank you for reading. I hope you’re all having a lovely day. ❤

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My Everyday Winter Makeup.

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Hello there,

I hope your week is going well so far. Today I thought that I would share with you my everyday winter makeup. Now, I’m not great at makeup (I am far from a professional) but over the past year I have been getting into trying out new products and makeup techniques. I have really been loving putting makeup on.

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  • Face Blur: Peripera 
    It does a great job at evening out your complexion. After applying this I find that my foundation goes on a lot smoother. 
  • Eye Primer: Collection
    This is the first eye primer that I’ve bought. It seems to be okay so far. 
  • Foundation: Innisfree
    I love foundations from Innisfree. I find that this gives a really even tone. It’s easy to apply and is long lasting. 
  • Eyeshadow: Urban Decay Naked 2
    I’m in love with this palette. I usually use the colours ‘Tease’, ‘Bootycall’, ‘Busted’ and ‘Ydk’. Then for a little bit of eyeliner I use ‘Blackout’. I really like this combination of colours. 
  • Eyeshadow (Brown): Too Cool for School
    I use this to just fill in my brows a little. 
  • Oh! My Eye Lash Volume Mascara: Etude House
    I love love love this mascara. But I always find that it doesn’t last that long. It runs out fairly quickly. I do find that the mascara sticks to the lashes. It lasts all day and it can be a bit of a pain to remove. 
  • Pink Lip Pencil: Maybelline
    This is a recent purchase. I’m loving it so far. It’s the first time I’ve actually used a lip liner. 
  • Vivid Matte Liquid Lipstick: Maybelline 
    Again, this is a new purchase. I actually bought a matte lipstick a couple of weeks ago from Sleek but I really wasn’t keen on the colour of it. It was too dark for me. But this one from Maybelline, I love it so far. I’m really into using pink lipstick right now. It goes great with the lip liner too. 
  • White Brushes: Elf
    These were a gift from my friend last year. I’m still using them. I love them. They are simple of use. To be honest I’m not sure what to look for in a good brush, but these seem to do the job. 
  • Pink Brush: Etude House
    It does it’s job. I’m thinking I might replace this soon with a proper brow brush.
  • Black Brush: Boots
    I love this brush. I find it so easy to apply my eyeliner with. 

That’s everything. I actually didn’t realise how many products I use until writing this post.

I love how makeup makes me feel. It makes me feel more confident, and more put together.

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Thank you very much for reading.

Let me know in the comments what everyday winter makeup products you use. ❤

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The Power of Positivity.

Dear Journal,

I’ve mentioned this in a previous post, I’m always guilty of paying too much attention to the negatives in my life and dismissing everything positive.

Over the past couple of weeks I have began to change that. Every time something good happens, or I do something that I think I couldn’t do. I write the positive thing on a piece of paper and put it into a jar.

Writing my positives and achievements down on paper allows me to focus on the positive steps that I’ve taken.

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I’ve been having a good week this week. I’ve been motivated, positive and healthy. I’ve been doing yoga most nights. Drinking more water. Eating most meals. Writing in my journal…sometimes haha. It’s made me feel much more optimistic.

When you’re feeling down, stressed or negative I would definitely suggest doing this. It really helps you to see that you have more positive things in your life than you think you do. 

How is your week going so far? ❤

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Thank you. 💕

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Well! That happened fast. I made a mental goal of trying to get my blog follow count to 300 by the New Year. However, I did not think it would be possible.

Thank you to everyone that follows this blog. Whether you followed when I first started blogging or whether it was recently. I thank you all!

When I started this blog, I did not think in a million years that I would hit 10 followers, never mind 300.

Thank you for sticking around to hear my ramblings. I hope that you will stick around with me in the new year too.

I have lots of new things planned for next year. I’m excited to share it all with you.

Check out what New Year Resolutions I have made for 2017.

From the bottom of my heart ~ Thank you ❤

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